Top 100 Funny Christmas Wishes 2016

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Funny Christmas wishes are here for wishing your friends for making them happy on Christmas day and sending funny Christmas wishes is another way to make them smile. Your friends will surely like the funny Christmas wishes messages and funny merry Christmas wishes. Get the perfect Christmas wishes greetings with the perfect Christmas wishes wording to show your affection and joy.



 Funny Christmas Wishes


Here are some of funny Christmas wishes and Christmas card wordings that you can use for your Christmas cards. You can also use these messages as Christmas SMS and Christmas Text messages. You can send these Christmas Wishes along with some great Christmas gifts to show your love and affection to somebody.


Also Check: Top 35 Christmas Wishes Saying 2016
Also Check: Top 25 Short Christmas Wishes 2016
Also Check:  33+ Best Christmas Wishes 2016


Funny Christmas Greeting Card Messages


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Christmas is for priest, He rejoices
Again and again while delivering the speech
To helpless Church crowd.

(Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing)
So let us celebrate the Christmas here
Merry Christmas to you

Christmas is truly full of wonders.
It makes all of my savings disappear!
That is the Christmas magic
Merry Christmas

They say that Christmas is just around the corner
How can it be when the world is round?

Anybody know where can I buy love?
They told me that it is the best thing to give this Christmas.

I think Santa’s wish for this Christmas should be to lose weight.

Rudolph has a red nose because he is drunk.

I think Santa should hire giants instead of elves so that he can have a faster production of gifts.

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Funny Merry Christmas Clip Art



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Anybody know where can I buy love? They told me that it is the best thing to give this Christmas.

I think Santa’s wish for this Christmas should be to lose weight.
Rudolph has a red nose because he is drunk.

I think Santa should hire giants instead of elves so that he can have a faster production of gifts.

Before, children are the carolers. Nowadays, I wonder why streets are field with adult carolers.

Mother gives coins to children carolers, and gives bills to adult ones. Why is that so? Isn’t it Christmas is for children?

I am so excited to wear my new dress today just to see that my Godparents were out of their house.

I think Santa must ride a plane instead of sleigh so that he can reach me faster. I oftentimes fell asleep waiting for him.

Is Santa so busy that he cannot find time to groom himself? I think he needs to shave his beard.
People went to midnight mass not to hear mass, but to let their seatmates hear their snores.

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Funny Inspirational Christmas Quotes



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OMG! Christmas already? Wishing you a "train load" of good wishes.
Hope your Christmas is the "M" word (Merry)!!!
Holidays are exhausting. Ho Ho! Keep calm and enjoy Christmas!
Hoping you have a 100% Awesome Christmas 2016!
I wish you a White Christmas! But if your White Wine runs out, drink the Red...
This year you was not good... You was FANTASTIC! May your celebration be joyous and your holidays bright!
It's all fun and games 'till Santa checks the Naughty List... Can't wait to see your gift by Christmas!
How do cats greet each other at Christmas?
A furry Merry Christmas and happy Mew Year!
May Santa always stop at your house. Merry Christmas!
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Funny Christmas Messages Greetings


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funny christmas messages greetings


A Christmas shopper’s complaint is one of long-standing
Watch where you step. Watch where you go. You may end up under the mistleto.
Joy resounds in the hearts of those
who believe in the miracle of Christmas!
Wishing you all the peace, joy, and love
of the season! Season’s Greetings!

Christmas is great but,
Everyone’s insane!
Going crazy with this funny Christmas game
Wrapping gifts and cooking food
And no one has time or is not in the mood.

Giving gifts to one another
No one has time for my brother
No attention for me at all
I can’t even go to the mall!

Christmas morning comes and what do I seeFunny Christmas Wishes

Happy ChristmasTwo things upon this changing earth
can neither change nor end;
the splendor of Christ’s humble birth,
the love of friend for friend.

When you’re lonely, I wish you Love!
When you’re down, I wish you Joy!
When you’re troubled, I wish you Peace!
When things seem empty, I wish you Hope!
Have a Happy New Year!

We wish you and your family and friends a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. May all your holidays be happy and may you have a year blessed with joy, love, and abundance.

Lets welcome the year which is fresh and new,
Lets cherish each moment it beholds,
Lets celebrate this blissful New year.
Merry X-mas

I am dreaming of white Christmas,
with every christmas card i write,
May your days be merry and bright,
and May all your christmases be white.
Happy Christmas.

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Funny Christmas Wishes For Friends



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funny christmas greeting card messages


  1. Christmas is a time when you get homesick – even when you’re home. ~ Carol Nelson
  2. I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up, they have no holidays. ~ Henry Youngman
  3. Blessed is the season which engages the whole world in a conspiracy of love! ~ Hamilton Wright Mabie
  4. The worst gift is a fruitcake. There is only one fruitcake in the entire world, and people keep sending it to each other. ~ Johnny Carson
  5. He who has no Christmas in his heart will never find Christmas under a tree. ~ Sunshine Magazine
  6. Never worry about the size of your Christmas tree. In the eyes of children, they are all 30 feet tall. ~ Larry Wilde
  7. I stopped believing in Santa Claus when my mother took me to see him in a department store, and he asked for my autograph. ~ Shirley Temple
  8. That’s the true spirit of Christmas; people being helped by people other than me. ~ Jerry Seinfeld
  9. People really act weird at Christmas time! What other time of year do you sit in front of a dead tree in the living room and eat nuts and sweets out of your socks? ~ Anonymous
  10. Anyone, who believes that men are the equal of women, has never seen a man trying to wrap a Christmas present. ~ Anonymous
  11. I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, toys not included. ~ Bernard Manning
  12. Christmas is a time when kids tell Santa what they want and adults pay for it. Deficits are when adults tell the government what they want and their kids pay for it. ~ Richard Lamm
  13. Santa Claus wears a Red Suit, He must be a communist. And a beard and long hair, Must be a pacifist. What’s in that pipe that he’s smoking? ~ Arlo Guthrie
  14. Christmas is a time when everybody wants his past forgotten and his present remembered. What I don’t like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day. ~ Phyllis Diller
  15. Let me see if I’ve got this Santa business straight. You say he wears a beard, has no discernible source of income and flies to cities all over the world under cover of darkness? You sure this guy isn’t laundering illegal drug money? ~ Tom Armstrong
  16. Christmas is the Disneyfication of Christianity ~ Don Cupitt
  17. Christmas, children, is not a date. It is a state of mind. ~ Mary Ellen Chase
  18. You know you’re getting old, when Santa starts looking younger. ~ Robert Paul
  19. Roses are reddish, Violets are bluish, If it weren’t for Christmas, We’d all be Jewish. ~ Benny Hill
  20. Christmas is a race to see which gives out first – your money or your feet. ~ Anonymous
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